After Sixth Straight Loss, Unicorns Attempt Reform

The Incredible Hulkicorn attempts to smash Rewire.
Notice that they're all still smiling.
(edit: Leslie Paxton proclaims that Hulkicorn is in fact ready to
"slake his thirst" upon Rewire)

The good news: The Unicorns are noting and fixing their problems.

The bad news: They didn't do it in time to face a team with a losing record that was once just as bad as theirs is.

     Kevin Carpenter, known to two as MagiCarp, took the mound for the first time last week.  The week prior, he told Coach Weaver that he was a little bashful about pitching in a game since the last time he pitched (which was for a different team) he was told that he was a terrible pitcher.  His feeling on the matter led Weaver to start Rianna Hoffman that week, but after those games, Weaver could not afford not to play Carpenter against Rewire.

     The result: six innings, a 4.17 ERA, and a WHIP of 4.17--the second best start of the season.  Carpenter was able to successfully locate and pitch to contact most of the time, and when contact wasn't made, he struck out more than he walked.  Only five walks were issued--a season high--and eight strikeouts were recorded--a franchise high.  In one game, he was able to compete with some of the best performances by Hoffman at her prime last season.

Game Preview for 8/29/11

Unicorns of the Apocalypse vs. REWIRE

Princess Anne Athletic Complex Field Red #2

8:45-10:45pm

Leslie Paxton and her horn.  The silver
coming down from her scalp is pure
silvery magic (not a strap).

     Between the disasters of yestergames and now, two significant things happened.  

     One: the Incredible Hulkicorn (see last post) ripped through the earth.  It continues to make its way to Virginia Beach, smashing everyone and everything in its path (yes, that includes Hurricane Irene), and plans to secure the field for us prior to tomorrow night.  Word is that if we lose to REWIRE he will proceed to eat them and smash their souls.

     Two: RF Leslie Paxton's birthday was on Thursday.  She decided to channel the magic of unicorns everywhere and forged the horn that you see growing out from her skull.  Some of those in attendance at her soiree also showed to have horns bursting out of their brains into the warm evening air, including Greg Weaver, Lanah Stafford, and a bunch of others that were just affected by the might of that magic.

     Hulkicorn making REWIRE quiver in fear of certain consequences and channeling birthday'corn magic should allow for the Unicorns to procure victory tomorrow night.  REWIRE is the only other team in the division with an 0-4 record, so defeating them twice could bring the Unicorns up quite a bit in the division depending on how the other teams play.

     Kevin Carpenter will make his premiere start on the mound at 8:45.

Unicorns Walk in X^n Runs, Proceed to Summon Earthquake

            The moral of the story, as one Unicorn put it on Monday night, is to never take the lead in the first. 

In three out of four games played thus far, the Unicorns have taken the lead in said inning, only to lose it later on.  On this particular Monday night, Coach Greg Weaver sent Rianna “Real Time” Hoffman out to the mound to pitch her first game since mid-July, where she had a relatively mediocre outing against a tough team, ZDUB Softball.  He thought the mental rest over the break and the Unicorns’ first two games would be sufficient time to get Hoffman back closer to her mid-spring form despite Hoffman not being able to warm up for very long between her arrival and the bottom of the first.  “She was only able to throw a few pitches to me before she went out there.  They looked good and I was confident she’d settle in, but it just wasn't working tonight,” he said in a post-game interview.